spoonfork

so just because you're listening to supposedly obscure indie bands numerous other acts that one ever heard of before, that makes you an elitist bastard?

Yeah so I was all glammed in some pseudo goth outfit one Friday night but instead of singing along drunkenly like a mahai to The Cure in Loft, I became a full on DJ Krush aficionado by busting out some killer trip hop moves whilst the rest of the Velvet Underground crowd sat there sipping Moet, shaking their heads at the stupid emo goth bitch who was dancing to something other than House or Trance. Yeah so it's quite amusing for you fuckers to go through my MP3s and find that I have Bach tracks somewhere in between Ash, Azure Ray, And You Will Know Us By The Trail of the Dead, Badly Drawn Boy, Beatles, Bjork, Bright Eyes, Boa, Boards of Canada, BT and Busta Rhymes. And that's just A and B. But you know what? Fuck all of you. I listen to whatever the fuck I fancy whenever the fuck I feel like looking however the fuck I want to, because I like being cock eyed. (tits of fury)

well, i dunno. music was never supposed to make one angsty, af far as i'm concerned, and neither was it supposed to make one an elitist bastard.

and i'm certainly not one. who me? who the f*ck are you kidding!? the reason why i listen to so many bands and too little genres is because it makes me feel good and far superior than your pet dog. or goldfish.

listening to: dj food - spiral dub

the power of two:

• SRI and RSI, respectively, sports related injury and repetitive stress injury. SRI due to gym, and futsal, two days in a row. i'm not gonna use the mouse for a while, and thank goodness now i can park at the disabled parking lot. hoorah!


• two months away from the office. it felt good to be back.


• 2 kgs. that's how much weight i've lost.


• 20 more, and it'll be 2000 - the number of emails in my mailbox

so that's 2 x 2 bullets. no updates on the weekend, because, you know, i'm being sensible.

listening to: raekwon - curious

the catch-22 situation, the ones that i've been explaining over and over but no one seems to grasp.

• a simple mission: develop a marketable product that fills a niche, and sell it. make money. sell-out. retire early.


• the problem: you don't believe in venture capitalists, you've almost depleted your war chest. the few things you have: your guts, ideas, the believe in your product.


• the catch-22 shituation: you don't have the money to build it. even if you do, it means that you're not gonna be able to pay for your own salary.


• so, you're back to doing small projects here and there (see cash flow below), and that child of yours, that dream, that believe, that goddamn product never materialized. and you know that the vendors are going to implement the same shit sooner or later.


• what if you just spend the remaining of your war chest on development? right, but how long can you sustain without venture fundings until your first sale? along the line, you need to drop/halt development to do other projects in order to sustain, which is as good as not doing any development work at all.

this is what been playing in my head every f*cking morning when i get up, and every night when i sleep (that and my miserly life, or course).

another thing that people seems to misunderstood is the cash flow problem, or rather, the illlogics of cash flow. i'm not gonna dwell on this but suffice to say that the amount of projects you do is not directly proportional to the amount of money you earn. in addition, the number of months in a year is not directly proportional to the number of projects you get. not all things add up.

there's an uglier head as well - starting an IT business in malaysia is hard.

after a couple of years and a few setbacks, i think what i've written above is pretty much true (unless you're born with silver spoons or your dad's name starts with a tan sri or it's on the net so it must be true) because as far as i'm concerned, i am smarter than a monkey.

listening to: tori amos - crucify

dear weblog,

today has been okay except that when i took out the dvds from that cheap plastic bag, i found:

• scary movie 4


• ultraviolet


• il divo: encore

instead of

• scary movie 4


• ultraviolet


• 16 blocks

in all honesty, mr dvdman, i know you were all euphoric because the only hot chick in the store asked for your name and phone number, but that il divo crap you pulled on me was not jocular.

listening to: blackalicious - swan lake (instrumental)

i told you my apartment complex is ghetto!